Episode #36: Archetypes of Survival – Prostitute & Permissiveness

If there is anyone in your life who tends to agree with you when you know they disagree, you’re acquainted with the Prostitute Archetype (before you say anything – as you likely got caught off guard after reading that – when we talk about the Prostitute Archetype it’s NOT related to sex!). People using this Archetype believe it’s a whole lot safer if they just keep their mouths shut. It’s true that everyone does this to a certain extent – we go along to get along, pick our battles, and might not speak up when we really aren’t invested one way or another, however, the Prostitute Archetype does it ALL THE TIME!

People who live from this Persona don’t even bother negotiating for what they want, instead rationalizing, doing mental gymnastics, and finding workarounds to get what they need in secret. The problem is that at the same time they whine they aren’t being respected or if it’s being used by a parent or leader, that they aren’t listened to. They don’t see how their permissive behavior and willingness to sell out their integrity are at the root of their dysfunctional relationships.

In today’s episode, we explore the Prostitute Archetype, the tendency to sell out its integrity for the sake of security, and the loss of self-esteem that occurs as a result. We’ll also recount numerous Prostitute Archetype stories (our own and of our clients) and share tips and tricks for empowering yourself and gaining the courage to live up to your own values. Tune in to make sure you don’t miss out on the gems we share this week!

If you want to know more about Anne & Heather’s work with dismantling dysfunctions in organizations and leadership behavior at Caliber Leadership Systems, check out:

https://dismantlingdysfunction.com

https://www.dranitsaris-hilliard.com

https://caliberleadership.com

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Are you dealing with an organizational dysfunction you need help with? Or do you have a story you would like to share on our show? Contact us at [email protected].

 

IN THIS EPISODE:

  • [01:51] Episode introduction and overview
  • [03:21] What is the Prostitute Archetype?
  • [10:53] Exploring the Drama Triangle
  • [05:34] Importance of Integrity
  • [21:59] Imposter Syndrome & The Prostitute Archetype
  • [29:36] Episode Gem
  • [32:18] Episode Wrap Up

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

  • The Prostitute Archetype trades in power. It is mostly unspoken and sometimes it is hard to see that there is a trade-off at all. When expressing an opposing opinion or asking for something for us, we have a conversation with ourselves and come up with reasons and excuses to put the needs of others first.
  • When we shift to the Prostitute Shield, we start using the behaviors and characteristics of the Persona we need to shield us from the perceived psychological threat. In other words, we are on the defensive, using fight-flight instinctual reactions.
  • The Prostitute Persona causes us to carry a feeling within us that we are lacking, that we are not enough and is closely related to the Imposter Syndrome. As a result, we’re compelled to look outside of ourselves to find our wholeness. We believe that we can fill what we perceive as lacking in ourselves by selling ourselves out to others so that they’ll approve of us and affirm our value.
  • Do you feel like the folks in your personal or work life live from the Prostitute Archetype? Listen to the full episode to learn what you can do to start living from your Authentic Self!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Deciding to compensate for poor performance instead of managing it is an act of self- disempowerment."
episode 18 quote tile 2 - "When acting from the Victim Leadership Persona, our power and sense of personal agency is taken away by seeing situations through a  lens of helplessness."
episode 18 quote tile 3 - "Self-disempowerment starts from within. Leaders need to recognize when they are keeping their self-esteem low."
episode 18 - quote tile 4 - "Leaders need to watch that they aren't being pulled into the position  of rescuer when interacting with employees."

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